Eat Me

I’ve heard people referred to as sweet before. Not me, mind you. This is usually after the sweet one has performed some selfless act or perhaps they are always sweet, with a perpetual sticky grin upon their faces. I have been called sweet on occasion, but I don’t think that is the flavor that even those that don’t know me very well would permanently bestow. I think I have a much broader range of characteristics than just one. I’d like to keep my dry humor without it being moisturized or dampened down. I have been bitter when I cannot seem to find my way and others don’t share my frustration or even sense that something is wrong, but this only seems to be temporary and not a taste I carry with me all the time. I am sour when I don’t get enough sleep or I cannot seem to gather my students’ attention at the end of a dreary day. I try not to be sour for too long because I think I might turn out looking like some of those older women with pinched and puckered mouths. I inspect my mouth nightly for telltale lemon lines. My favorite innate taste is that of a nut. Nuttiness can crop up at the most inopportune times. Sitting in a serious faculty meeting and casually recording the inordinate number of times the speaker uses a word until it almost becomes meaningless and having to stifle the giggles. Or being handed an acronym that I cannot remember the original meaning of and making up my own new and special one, usually with some dirty words included. I can even change my temperature from chiller cold to spicy hot. I am cold when I withdraw to protect myself or hide my true feelings. I would rather be thought of as something hot. Hot and steamy, liquid and vibrant. Like hot chocolate on an icy day, warming my way to the chilly core. Some food words we might want to avoid. What would someone be like if they were crispy? Would they tend to break if you weren’t careful with them? If you referred to someone as chunky, would that mean they were overweight or just lumpy? If you were light and fluffy, people might think you were empty with no substance. I’ve heard people labeled cheesy, meaning they were cheap and tacky. And I think that fruity already has some bad connotations. When I think about myself from now on, I think I will try and connect to one of my favorite flavors, rich dark chocolate. I’m deep and sweet, smooth and creamy, but not sweet.